"Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth." ~ 1 John 3:18
I'm a homeschooling mama to two very different children. My 6-year-old son is a sweet, laid-back, smart, hands on and active learner, while my 5-year-old daughter is a precious, worksheet-loving, bright sit down and read 100 books kind of learner. Polar opposites when it comes to learning styles. But they are both so incredibly smart and, in my humble opinion, cute as buttons.
But boy oh boy can they get under their mama's skin sometimes (aka...Me!).
I am not perfect by any stretch of the imagination. I began the year 2020 setting my intentional word for the year as "Calm", if that tells you anything. I tend to have a short fuse, something I'm working on and constantly in prayer about. I have found that the more I dig into my Bible and spend time with Jesus, whether in the morning, on my mat and/or before I close my eyes at night, I find "calm" in His strength, not in my own.
All this to say, I have noticed something in my parenting. I have noticed that words mean something to my children, but mostly at a surface level. I can tell them "I love you" all day long, but if my actions don't match up, I fear they don't believe me.
We were driving the other day around town. Kids were quietly enjoying a song on the radio, while I took the much needed drive to clear my head. Homeschool that day had been, let's just say, not-so-fun-mama-blew-up-a-few-times. Yes, it was not a good day. I had been short tempered, and just wasn't a positive individual in our home that day.
I took a deep breath, looking in my rearview mirror at my precious babies, and said, "I'm so sorry you guys. I'm sorry mommy had a hard day today and wasn't very kind. I love you both more than you can imagine."
I remember being unkind that day. But it wasn't my words that the kids brought up or my tone of voice, it was my actions. "Mommy, why didn't you give me a big hug today?" and, "Mommy, why did you need to do yoga without me?" and, "Mommy, why did you go to the potty for a long time?" (Haha, that one made me chuckle a little), and the one that really grabbed at my heart, "Mommy, why didn't you let me cuddle with you when you were sad?"
Boy. That will put you in your place something REAL quick. A 6 and 5 year old observing and sharing your actions. They pay attention, that's for sure.
I think that's the core of this week's passage from 1 John 3:18. I believe that the lesson here is that we can use our words, we can even craft a whole speech around loving others, but if our actions don't match up, what does it matter? Our words fail us if our actions are poor.
And then there's the truth part. This is what I think is most important and we can't miss this. We must love with truth behind our love. What does that mean, though? I believe that means that we have to first begin in truth (God's Word), fill our minds and hearts with what God says is love, and then live our love through that, through Him. Does that make sense?
We can apply this in two different ways, among others. But I feel that it can begin here:
1. Speaking truth over those we love and profess love for. Praying Bible verses over our children, over our marriages, over ourselves and then living it out in our days. God's Word is the basis of all love, if we start there and then speak it into our lives and into other's, then the words become living words, inviting Jesus into our relationships. And love can only live there.
2. Meditate on God's Word and apply it. Take 1 John 3:18 for example. Take to heart that actions speak louder than words. Simple, but when put into action in our days, I believe that love becomes more profound, our hearts soften and our words become less necessary. Act on truth, act on love and the rest follows.
This week's yoga journal prompt is:
Choose a Bible verse that you can speak into your life and/or into your personal relationships. Apply the verse this week in loving others. Write about your experience in acting on love through truth.
Take some time to dig into God's Word. Land on a verse, or a passage, that you can apply this week as you think about loving others. Act on love as God's Word prompts you to. Jot down your experience and how this made a difference in your day, your week, your life, your relationships.
Some ideas to help you think through this week's journaling prompt:
1. Think of someone you love dearly - a child, your spouse, a friend, a parent or grandparent - and write down why you love them. Then spend some time thinking of some ways, some actions you can take to show them love.
2. Take the 5 Love Languages Quiz (click here) to discover your love language. Once you discover your results, journal about it. What did you find out about yourself and your love language? How can you foster your own love language?
3. Show love to a random stranger. A few ideas include buying someone's lunch or coffee, offer a kind word, help a stranger in the grocery store, etc. Journal about your experience. How did it make you feel to help others without expectation?
Let's get you moving:
In yoga, love is usually expressed in the chest and heart area of the body. And so, when you attend a class themed around love, you may find that the teacher bases his/her class around that region of the body.
Spend some time exploring heart openers as you practice this week. A few poses could include the following:
*Roll up a thick blanket making a long thick roll. Sit on the mat. Place the end of the roll at the base of the spine and recline the spine over the roll. Allow the arms to rest with palms face up by your side. Stay and breathe as your chest opens and unwinds.
*Low Lunge, arms lifted, take a deep breath in and take a mini backbend. Breathe into the chest a few deep breaths. Switch legs.
*A few rounds of Cat/Cow, focusing on Cow. Pause in Cow pose and breathe as your hug the shoulder blades together to broaden through the front of the chest.
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